Ecstatic Theatrics Scripts
"The Wicked Witch has lost her fight. Dorothy was her Kryptonite!"
Witty, Twist Ending Children's and Community Theater Scripts by Jeannette Jaquish —
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Your actors and audiences will LOVE Jeannette Jaquish’s very AFFORDABLE scripts full of action and suspense, with great lines for every character!
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Use the buttons and links that are being added daily, or contact Playwright Jeannette Jaquish at ecstatictheatrics@yahoo.com 260 750-9013
The Wizard of Oz - musical
"And I won't be dumb and dumber, After writing every number, If I only had a brain!"
From the classic by L. Frank Baum, comes a delightful musical stageplay by Jeannette Jaquish
CAST: 20 to 39+
TECH: Medium-Difficult. Wiazrd Giant Head can be a projection from a live camera, or a recording, or a big puppet.
LENGTH: 120 to 130 minutes.COST: Complex: 1st performance: $60; Additional: $20 each; or $120 for a year.
Simplified: 1st performance: $40; Additional: $15 each; or $100 for a year.
3-CD Music Set or Thumb Drive or Google Share (Act 1, Act 2, Rehearsal): $60
This play is a $$Money-Maker! Of all my scripts, this one brings in the largest audience. It is BETTER than the MGM movie ver$ion. Lots more lines and spotlight scenes for Munchkins, Monkeys, Winkies and Emerald Citizens.
ORDER a script! EXCERPTS CAST & SCENES
Harry Potter and the Obnoxious Voice
"Dobby will pour red ants into his ears for punishment!"
a parody by J.R Jaquish, of the Harry Potter book series by J.K. Rowling and the movies based on her books.
<--Click for EXCERPTS, PHOTOS and TECH!
COST: 1st performance: $40; addtl: $20 each; or 1 year: $100.
MUSIC FILES: $40
CAST: 9 to 26 actors
LENGTHS: 32 min./ 45 min./ 65 min. / 75 min / 100 min. / 120 min.
POSTER ART by Zephyr Jaquish
TECH: Medium-simple. Mostly ordinary objects. Tech notes, poster art, prop list,etc.
"I printed out the script and I couldn’t stop laughing. I am going to have too much fun doing this show! You have been much more helpful than any other play company I have ever worked with. By the way- working in the Puppet Pals reference was brilliant and I can already see the Time Clock Life number in my head. Thanks again!"-- Laura Comito, Artworks Studio, 507 N. Main St., Carroll, Iowa www.carrollarts.org
Slipperzzzz! ~ Cobb and the Twelve Dancing Princesses, a Musical
by Jeannette Jaquish
"Then send your darling princesses to the blacksmith for iron shoes, because I QUIT!" —The Royal Shoemaker.
~ Girls and boys will love this action-packed fighting-dancing musical comedy romance (with no kissing)!
COST: 1st performance: $40; -- additional performances: $20 each; or 1 year: $100.
MUSIC FILES: $40
CAST: 24 TO 43 actor-dancer-singers, includes lots of fun Townfolk Bandits, Servants, Underworld Princes & Villains.
TECH: Simple furniture, lighting, props, and sets. Tech notes & stage drawings.
LENGTH: About 130 minutes.
CAST: 24 to 43 actor-dancer-singers, includes lots of fun Townfolk, Bandit, Servant, Underworld Princes and Villains.
The Damsel Game
a short fairytale twist ending parody by Jeannette Jaquish
A parody of "The Dating Game" from the 1970's. -- ZOOM version available!
Prince Charming tosses questions to Cinderella, Snow White and Rapunzel to pick his Dream Date . . . . Nightmare!HOST: “This capable girl can set the table and cook up a meal for 7 hungry mouths plus herself! She has known a lot of very short men and would love to date a fellow she can look up to. You know her name, she is . . . . . Snow White! Have a seat, Snow White! Our Damsel Number One!”
Larger cast, longer version includes Sleeping Beauty, TV Director and 1 or 2 TV show Hosts.
ADJUSTABLE CAST SIZES: 5 to 8 (up to 4 girls, 1 boy, 3 either): 1 or 2 Show Hosts, Prince Charming, Cinderella, Snow White, Rapunzel plus optional: Sleeping Beauty and TV Director.
COST: 1st performance: $20; -- additional performances: $10 each; or 1 year: $50.
LENGTHS: 15 to 17 minutes.
TECH: 4 or 5 chairs, "Damsel Game" sign-to-print, partition, fake bird spray bottle, princess dresses, long wig. Larger cast: headphones, clipboard, old fashioned.
ORDER A SCRIPT
Auditioning a Ghost
from the Sir Arthur Conan Doyle story, "Selecting a Ghost",
a ghostly thriller adapted for stage by Jeannette Jaquish
”I need moonlight to be effective." -- the Jilted Bride Ghost
Arthur Conan Doyle wrote this in his earlier years, before his Sherlock Holmes series eclipsed his other excellent works.
TWO SIZES OF CAST:
- - Medium CAST: 13 to 22, LENGTH: 75 min.
COST: 1st performance: $40; addtl: $20 each; 1 year: $100.
- - Larger CAST: 30, LENGTH: 85 minutes, approximately.
COST: 1st performance: $50; addtl: $20 each; 1 year: $110.
TECH: Easy. Move furniture for set change. Ghostly lighting and fog.
About Auditioning a Ghost Excerpts Order Me!
Dr. Frankenstreudel’s Lemon Fresh Laboratory of Horrors
"Sometimes I feel like saying, 'Fetch your own clotting factor!'" -- Misty, the sickly lab rat
an absurd thriller science themed stage play by Jeannette Jaquish
SUMMARY: Four squabbling urchins escape a mad doctor, a Julia Child / Frankenstein monster, a sickly lab rat and ravenous zombies. Educational, witty and absurd with lots of action.
COST: 1st performance: $20; Additional: $10 each; or 1 year : $60. -- ORDER Me!
Does not include music.
CAST: 2 boys, 2 girls, 4 or 7 adults or big kids
LENGTH: 55 minutes. 5 scenes. Medium tech complexity. At least a 3 1/2 foot high platform needed for graveyard scene.
QUOTES: "Those little wretches ruined my best spoons prying the bars of their cages!" -- Eyegore
"They may be mindless, flesh-eating zombies, but they are still your elders." -- Old Man Wellard -- Click for excerpts.
an absurd mystery by Jeannette Jaquish
A Great St. Patrick's Day Theater Script! This absurd, action-packed, edgy script is perfect for experimental theater or teenage casts, plus a few little kids to be leprechauns!
COST: $10 per performance; or 1 year: $40. Order Me!
CAST 9 to 28 actors. Need 3 to 7 kids and at least 6 to 21 teens or adults.
LENGTH: about 55 minutes.
TECH: Easy-medium. Alternates scenes onstage and in front of closed curtain or in the audience to cover set changes. No special lighting.
COSTUMES & PROPS: 1 big and 3 small leprechaun costumes. A cop and detective. Toy machine guns. Lucky Charm and Trix cereal boxes. A working vacuum cleaner. Two Camcorders, working or not.
<--POSTER ART by Zephyr Jaquish
Who Framed Lucky the Leprechaun?
Alice in Wonderland
"She doesn't chop off anyone's head! It's the rest of you who do it for her!" -- Alice's rallying cry to the Queen's subjects
Lewis Carroll’s classic story adapted for stage by Jeannette Jaquish
ACTORS: 23 to 40 actors, often playing multiple parts, all ages.
LENGTH: 2 hours but never boring. Longer with optional Walrus & Carpenter, and Humpty Dumpty scenes.
TECH: Complex. Falling down the Rabbit Hole & Hallway of Doors and Pool of Tears, plus Alice growing & shrinking involve some manipulation but it is all explained for a low tech method.
COST: 1st performance: $30; Additional: $15 each; $90 for a year of unlimited performances.
MUSIC FILES: $23
<— See Photos of Adams College in Colorado's production.
"I recently ordered Alice in Wonderland from you and I would like to say it's fantastic and going great. As this was the first thing I have ever directed, I was surprised by how easy the script made it for me. I'm glad to hear that I can film it."
--- Abi Harris, Trinity Theatre, Cowes, Isle of Wight, performance March 2011 — Review!
DRINK ME! EAT ME! ORDER ME!
Little Red Riding Hood and the Bad Idea Shortcut
as a Musical and a Non-Musical
folktale adapted to be an absurd comedy by Jeannette Jaquish
NARRATOR: The Wolf found Grandma’s extra night cap and put it on. He found her extra nightgown and tried to squeeeeeeze into it. Tried to suck in his breath and squeeeeeeeeze into it.
WOLF (putting on nightgown): I seem to have put on a little weight.
NARRATOR: The Wolf made a very ugly Grandma....
<--Click on Wolf and Red for EXCERPTS & DETAILS! ORDER ME!
CAST: 6
LENGTH: Non-musical= 18 minutes; Musical= 23 minutes.
PRICE: Non-Musical= $10 first performance, $3 additional, $25 for 1 year.
PRICE: Musical= $15 first performance, $5 additional, $25 for 1 year + MUSIC FILES: $15
TECH: MEDIUM-EASY - Need a bed stage prop. Fake trees. One Set.
The Narrator's lines prompt the actors’ lines. Narrator ad libbing can rescue when a line is forgotten.
“It’s a GOOD Life”, by Jerome Bixby
- - Adapted for the stage by Jeannette Jaquish from the short story by Jerome Bixby.
"They were thinking about making a trap for me. That's why I made them catch on fire."
- a suspense-filled stageplay based on the award winning 1953 story by Jerome Bixby, famous science fiction author
- adapted for “The Twilight Zone” by Rod Serling 1961
- produced by Stephen Spielberg in “Twilight Zone: The Movie”, 1983
- spoofed in “The Simpson’s Treehouse of Horror II”, 1991
LENGTH: approximately 55 minutes
CAST: 13 or more, including 1 small girl or boy, and 2 teenagers.
ROYALTY to the Bixby family: $40-first performance, $20-additional , $100 for one year.
Among a long list of writings, Jerome Bixby wrote scripts for three Star Trek episodes, co-wrote the story that Fantastic Voyage was based upon, and dictated "The Man From Earth" on his deathbed to his son Emerson, in 1998. The Star Trek: Deep Space Nine- Mirror Universe Episode "The Emperor's New Cloak", 1999, was dedicated to Bixby's memory.
This stage adaptation was written by Jeannette Jaquish with the permission of Jerome’s son Emerson
Bixby. It contains added characters and lines, and actions adapted for stage. The all powerful child may be male or female.
Don’t Look in the Lake
"... while the losers have to clean the portapotty with their pillowcases!"
another hilarous suspenseful kid/teen script by Jeannette Jaquish
A spooky, dangerous, absurd comedy of life at camp. Lousy food, mean counselors, dead possum art projects, electric fences and hoeing the tobacco fields. And just when the week is almost over, the campfire stories start coming true.
COST: $15 first performance, $5 additional, or $35/year. ORDER SCRIPT!
PROPS: 2 clipboards, bin of recyclables, fake campfire, 2 balloons, broom, mop, backpacks, suitcases. Cheap camp table & 4 or 7 cheap folding chairs.
TECH: Quick but simple set changes. Need lighting for night scene.
LENGTH: - Short version: 7 or 8 characters: about 20 minutes.
- Scary/ridiculous version: 10 or 11 actors, about 24 minutes
- Less Scary Version: 11 actors, about 25 minutes
Wartsalot! - The Frog Prince and the Princess Brat
"Your play was a hit, and ended the year on a very high note! All of the parents, students, and other teachers that saw it bragged on how good it was. Thanks so much!" - - - Donna Huff, Pittman Center Elementary, Gatlinburg, Tennessee
"Taste fangs of death, Scoundrel Frog!" -- Cupcake, the Princess's pet
A fractured fairy tale children's theater script adapted for stage by Jeannette Jaquish
VERSION #1: The Frog Prince and the Princess Brat, a musical
CAST: 6 to 14 depending on short, medium or long version.
LENGTH: 20, 50 or 75 minutes. 4, 5 or 7 scenes. Medium tech complexity.
COST: 1st performance: $40; additional: $20 each; or 1 year: $100. // Music Files: $40
PRINCESS CONCEITA: A prince?? Not likely, talking like that. If you were ever a human you held out a beggar's hat."
FROG: "I teased a frail old woman, begging on the road. I kicked her cane to make her fall and Poof!-- I was a toad."
#2: The Frog Prince and the Princess Brats, Jr.
SIMPLIFIED with More Actors, in a Musical or NON-Musical versions
an easy children's fairy tale play by Jeannette Jaquish
The basic story with rhyming lines. Narrators can prompt actors when they forget a line.
THREE CAST SIZES: 14 to 22 actors, age 7 and up, in lengths of 20 to 25 minutes.
3 Princesses (so less crying after auditions), 3 or 4 Frog-puppets, a Queen, optional King, 1, 2 or 3 Narrators, 3, 4 or 5 Townsfolk, 3 or 4 Servants, and a Boy Prince.
COST: $30 first performance, $10 additional, or $50/year.
---- $30 for Music Files for the Musical Version.
Euthanasia Day at the Children’s Shelter
Original story by Linda Dunn, adapted for stage by Jeannette Jaquish
Rated PG. Serious, harsh, concepts showing categories of people losing their rights, and a display of physical cruelty. Nothing sexy. TV Cop shows and Grimm’s fairytales are worse.
"I have his notarized genetic design and birth title in my purse." — the unsatisfied mother giving up her child to the shelter.
NOT FOR LITTLE KIDS - Disturbing situations showing children in danger and abandoned, and the suspense of impending death.
CAST: 11 to 25, at least 2 children, 5 underfed teen boys (4 could be girls), one 17 year old boy strong enough to carry the grandma actor, 1 physically capable but not powerful grandma-type lead; Adults: 1 W, 2M to play multiple roles if not more adults.
SET: Home and yard. Bedroom or just the bedroom door. Lighting effects.
ROYALTY COST: $30 first show, $20 addtl., up to $100 for a year.
THEME: A disturbing possible future in which life extension technology and its resulting over-population and scarcity of land and resources has led society to produce lots of children to get the best and discard the rest. Playwright recommends warning away audience members under age 10. Child and teen roles require strong acting. ORDER ME!
You Don’t Bring Me Dead Flowers Anymore
a psychoanalysis spoof by Jeannette Jaquish
COST: $20 first performance, $5 additional, or $35/year.
Click for Excerpts. ORDER ME!
DESCRIPTION: Neither the therapist or the at-her-wits-end-wife realize that the husband's recent crude, grabby and drooling behavior is because he has been bitten on a camping trip and turned into a zombie.
I have seen audience members laugh until they cried as the husband flops and lurches around the stage trying to get his teeth on his wife's head, as the wife shoves him away using her chair and feet, and the therapist dismissing it all as the wife’s fault. Twist ending. One PG line is optional.
CAST of 11: Lead couple is male and female, the other couple, the therapist and 6 audience shills can be male or female.
TECH NEEDS: 3 sturdy chairs, therapist can have a cheat sheet on a clipboard.
LENGTH: a short play about 10 minutes
------ WIFE: Can we please talk about my husband's increasingly aggressive behavior? Like last week, when we were in K-mart, he tried to get my whole scalp in his mouth! I had to hit him with a can of paint.
Lost Hearts
by Montague Rhodes James (1862-1936), adapted for stage by Jeannette Jaquish
"Don't the trees look like claws grabbing at the sky?"
A classic ghost story by a famous author .
COST: $10 first performance, $5 additional, or $30/year.
CAST: Stephen, Mrs. Bunch, Mr. Parkes, Mr. Abney & 2 child ghosts: Jevanny & Phoebe.
LENGTH: About 55 minutes.
TECH NEEDS: furniture re-arranging set changes, need a fake fireplace, chairs, table, desk, bed with bedding, and the ability to run fishing line through a pulley in the ceiling for ghostly special effects.
DESCRIPTION: A suspenseful ghost story by M.R. James, a respected author of the 1800's. An orphan, Stephen, is unexpectedly sent for by his rich, eccentric, elderly cousin who is an expert on ancient religions' teachings on immortality. Stephen hears tales of two other orphans who disappeared leaving behind shoes or favorite toys. He is visited by child ghosts.
Pinocchio
adapted by Jeannette Jaquish from the classic by Carlo Collodi.
A naive wooden boy is tricked, trapped, turned into a donkey and swallowed by a sea monster because he would not listen to his father, 3 Blue Fairies and Jiminy - his Cricket Conscience. Happy ending.
COST: 1st performance: $40; -- addtl.: $20 each; or 1 year: $80.
LENGTH: Three versions: 45 min., 60 min., and 120 min.
CAST: 32, more or less with role sharing or multiple role playing.
TECH: Simple-Medium-Complex depending on what you decide. CLICK to ORDER a SCRIPT!
TROMBONI: Oh Pinocchio, you made me so much money today!
You are the Goose that laid the Golden Egg! You are my Cash Cow! You are my Gravy Train. You are making me rich, rich, rich!
PINOCCHIO: You are making me hungry hungry hungry. I’m going to go home now and eat dinner.
TROMBONI: Go home! Why of course, but first, I have a surprise for you. . . .
Strange Time at the Science Fair
a science themed sci-fi play script by Tom, Zephyr & Jeannette Jaquish
COST: $10 first performance, $5 additional, or $30/year. Order Me!
SUMMARY: The little science nerd says his invention can control time but while the judge stares skeptically at the unchanging pendulum the events transpiring behind them swing hilariously from high speed to slow motion. Using three real science fair projects and tone generator you can present an educational, absurd and very funny little show.
LENGTH: About 18 minutes.
CAST: 4 kids, 1 adult judge, 1 teen or adult photographer
PROPS: 3 real science fair projects, 1 fake project with all printed signs provided in the script- you paste them on a science fair board, pendulum, some kind of device to be the time controller, a tone or audio FX generator - even a toy keyboard with sound effects will work, card tables for the projects. Award ribbons or trophies.
TECH: A device that generates a high and low tone, such as a tone generator or an electronic keyboard.
Pippsi Longknickers
inspired by Astrid Lindgren’s “Pippi Longstockings”, adapted for stage by Jeannette Jaquish
SIR HORACE: "You were rather impressive yourself, autographing each cookie with your thumbprint."
PROF. BANANA: (holding up thumbs) "If you’ve got ‘em, flaunt ‘em."
<--Click on HORSE for excerpts and free Tea Party scene!
(Freckled bombshell bullies bullies, gooses high society and does her part for intergalactic harmony.)
COST: $20 per performance; or 1 year : $40. Order Me!
CAST: 16 to 25 actors, including 5 smaller and 5 larger
Length: 75 minutes or less (the last scene can be cut). 7 scenes. Medium tech complexity but a lot of it.
FREE: Tea Party Scene
Quotes: "Spelling bee award? How nice! Now you can hold your head up high around the prettier girls." -- Mrs. Belittleton
"Once Grandma's servant stole her grand piano but she had no place to hide it so she dragged a carpet over it and told Grandma that the house's foundation was settling unevenly!" -- Pippsi
Collecting All the Species
a twist ending science fiction dark comedy by Jeannette Jaquish
"Curse that alien technology! What kind of dysfunctional, twisted science bypasses the speed of light – a perfectly reasonable limitation?"
<--Click for excerpts! ~ Order a Script!
SUMMARY: Three marooned bio-nauts on a hostile planet orbiting two suns and being orbited by 3 moons discover the new dictator of Earth and his smoulderingly beautiful daughter will drop by for inspection in 4 hours. Versions rated PG or R for a potentially sexual situation.
COST: 1st performance: $25; additional: $10 each; or 1 year: $65.
CAST: 4 men, one mature commanding matronly woman, one beautiful commanding young woman, and 3 or 4 or more physically flexible males or females.
LENGTH: 45 minutes. 1 basic set plus a hill-platform and fake boulder and moons.
3 Delightful Children's Scripts, by Scott Rousseau
A Duck's Tale
by Scott Rousseau
<--Click on the Duck for Excerpts
"But Mom! I wanted the new medieval Barbie!" -- Snow White
Arcadia, the Ugly Duckling, bungles through many other fairy tales meeting Witches, Snow White, The Cheshire Cat, and even the police, causing mayhem and hilarity. Lots of fun character parts.
COST: $20 first performance, $10 each additional. $60 for one year.
CAST: 7 or more actors: 3 male, 3 female, age 12 thru adult. Multiple roles for some actors.
TECH: Simple Set and props, Lighting changes, No music
LENGTH: About 45 minutes.
O~O~O~O~O~O
A Campfire Tale
a puppet folktale by Scott Rousseau
CAST: 2 to 5: 1 to 4 puppeteers & 1 actor/backstage tech
LENGTH: About 12 minutes.
PRICE: $5 for 1 year.
TECH: EASY - A simple single set. Last actor is backstage tech.
O~O~O~O~O~O~
Cinderellie-Mae
a hillbilly parody of Cinderella by Scott Rousseau
CAST: 12
LENGTH: About 22 minutes.
PRICE: $10 for 1st show, $5 each additional, $35 for one year.
TECH: Flexible
FREE SCRIPTS to PERFORM!
Just CONTACT Jeannette Jaquish to request she send you a script from below. She always appreciates photos from your show. RULES for USING FREE SCRIPTS.
Fairy Tales on the Mars Frontier
Real science theater script by Jeannette Jaquish
Fairy tales evolve as pioneer parents on Mars teach values and survival to their kids.
Uses real scientific data about how humans could terraform and colonize Mars.
Actors: 11 to 35 Actors can play multiple parts.
Length: 35 minutes. 3 small stories within one long scene. Medium tech complexity.
Cost: FREE if you notify author, and give her proper announcement.
QUOTES:
"Is your dome strong? Mine blew in!"
"My dome sits low below the crater. Aluminum cover like a baked potater."
See RULES for USING FREE SCRIPTS
Fairy Tales on the Mars Frontier from old website! OR CONTACT to ASK for SCRIPT
The Spoiled Baloney Man
(That cycle of life and death really stinks.) CONTACT to ASK for SCRIPT
a fractured fairy tale by Jeannette Jaquish See Rules for USING FREE SCRIPTS
based on The Stinky Cheese Man - but better!
ACTORS: Cast of 8 or 12: Spoiled Baloney Man should be a cardboard puppet on a fishing pole and line that you make. Frog should be a puppet and is also the Narrator. Dog and Horse/Donkey should be costumed actors. Boy and Girl, and Old Man and Old Lady are actors.
Cast of 12 adds 1 child actor and 2 adult or teen characters and a cat.
LENGTH: 21 minutes for cast of 8; 25 minutes for cast of 12. 1 set. Simple-medium tech complexity
COST: FREE if you notify author, and give her proper announcement. See easy details. Easy Rules for Free Scripts.
QUOTE: "Not a pretty picture, or smell, when BALONEY GOES BAD! Raised by bacteria in a cold microwave oven. Would love, color and stimulation in its childhood have made a difference?"
If Shakespeare had Written the Theory of Relativity
Shakespeare's classic lines adapted into a swashbuckling debate on relativity.
an educated farce by Thomas Jaquish
COST: FREE!
CAST: Prince Albert, Zhugaid, Arshay, and two gossipy chambermaids.
PROPS & FURNITURE: Period costumes or something close, two champagne glasses, two knives or swords for a mock battle.
LENGTH: About 25 minutes.
Easy Rules for Free Scripts
If Shakespeare had Written the Theory of Relativity <--Click for script! OR CONTACT to ASK for SCRIPT
Kiss the Brown Bunny
an actors & puppets script by Jeannette Jaquish
(The flirty Cockroach bets grumpy Spike the dog that three people will kiss her in three minutes.)
<-- shown here: Folkmanis cockroach puppet.
ACTORS: 2 puppets, 3 actors
You may RENT THE PUPPETS from the author.
Length: 8 minutes. 1 scene. Very simple tech complexity.
PUPPETS:Acquiring Folkmanis cockroach puppet and Percy the Dog (from Pocohontas) is tricky. Rent them from the author. Click CONTACT and ask about the puppets when you ask for the SCRIPTS.
Cost: FREE if you notify author, and give her proper announcement.
Easy Rules for Free Scripts.
QUOTES:
"Cockroach: Even cockroaches have feelings and mine are hurting... Snuggle???
Spike the Dog: Get away from me you filthy insect! Go snuggle in a garbage disposal!"
The Way I Remember It
a fun kids play about remembering childhood, by Jeannette Jaquish
FREE - print it off from this website!
Get permission to perform just by notifying the author by email.
MORAL: Being mean makes more meanness.
CAST: 6 or more boys and 6 or more girls, 2 more kids, an older man and woman, and maybe a mom, an optional chorus of kids, plus 1 or 2 prop assistants.
SUMMARY: Little Jamie gets Grandma and Grandpa to tell the story of how they met as children, with two very different and funny perspectives.
Birthday Cake scene -Katanning Dramatic Society, Inc, Australia
Easy Rules for Free Scripts. CONTACT to ASK for SCRIPT
There’s a Fly in My Soup! / Hay Una Mosca en Me Sopa!
a Spanish & English script by Jeannette Jaquish CONTACT to ASK for SCRIPT
Cost: FREE RULES for USING FREE SCRIPTS
Scripts alternate Spanish with English so a person speaking either language can understand, and also learn the other language.
Quotes:
FATHER: Waiter! You have your thumb in my soup!!!
WAITER: (wiping thumb on napkin) Me fama? Gracias, Senor, pero las sopa no es caliente. (Exits)
FATHER: Thank you but it's not hot! I don't believe it! His dirty thumb was in my soup!
SON: Esta limpia, ahora.
FATHER: Ewwww! You eat. I'm not hungry now.
SON: (spits out first taste) Bleccchh!!
FATHER: Que pasa?
SON: There is a fly in this soup!
FATHER: Una mosca en tu sopa!!! Terrible!!
WAITER (Returns, placing bill on the table): La cuenta.
SON: MESERO! ESTA UNA MOSCA EN MI SOPA!
WAITER: Fly in your soup??? Is that a problem? Are you a vegetarian?!
The Monkey’s Paw, by W. W. Jacobs, 1902
adapted for stage by Jeannette Jaquish CONTACT to ASK for SCRIPT
The classic story of wishes gone bad. RULES for USING FREE SCRIPTS
Cast: Old man, old woman, grown son or daughter, Sergeant-Major Morris, Visitor from Maw & Meggins.
Length: 18 minutes.
Tech: 4 scenes. Simple set and costumes. Some quick but simple set changes.
Cost: FREE if you notify author, and give her proper announcement.
Hansel & Gretel and the Creepy Woods
CONTACT to ASK for SCRIPT RULES for USING FREE SCRIPTS
FREE script by Jeannette Jaquish
In a variety of cast sizes, lengths and languages!
Simple set and fun lines for every actor!
CAST: 11 to 30 actors. LENGTH: 15 TO 30 minutes long.
TRANSLATED into:
- French
- Norwegian
- Bi-Lingual Turkish-English
- and Bi-Lingual Any Language & English with your help.
MORAL: Don't let your kids drive you CraaAAAzy!
Little Orphant Annie, by James Whitcomb Riley
by James Whitcomb Riley, 1906
adapted for stage by Jeannette Jaquish
FREE - print it off from this website! Notify the Jeannette Jaquish by email before you perform.
MORAL: Don’t abuse your servants or one will get your kids to behave by scaring the geewhilikers out of them.
CAST: 7 children, 3 or 5 older actors.
--This is the folk poem about boogeymen, NOT Annie singing "Tomorrow! Tomorrow!" with Daddy Warbucks!
EXCERPT:
CHILD 1: And little Orphan Annie says, when the blaze is blue, And the lamp wick sputters, and the wind goes woo-oo!
CHILD 2: And you hear the crickets quit, and the moon is gray, And the lightning bugs in dew are all squenched away.
CHILD 3: You better mind your parents, and your teachers fond and dear, And cherish those who love you, and dry the orphan’s tear,
CHILD 4: And help the poor and needy ones who cluster all about, Or the Gobble-ins will get you
CHILDREN: If You Don’t Watch Out!
Are You Smarter Than a 4-H’er?
A FREE 4H contest skit script, by Jeannette Jaquish
CAST: 7 to 11 kids.
LENGTH: About 12 minutes.
TECH: Easy: desks, podiums (made of boxes), a flip chart.
SUMMARY A parody of the popular game show with JiffyPop Foxwabbit, Helping Hand Students, Demonstrators and Question Flippers, and a Suspicious Contestant. Can be used in 4H drama or video projects or adapted for other groups.
A Muggle's Snide Observation
by Jeannette Jaquish
Harry Potter is magical soap opera,
Hormonal teens spouting abracadabra;
But magic makes it too easy,
And Rowling would certainly get queasy,
Composing a duel 'twixt a shotgun and avada kedavra;